The real learning experience of school

Scott McLeod poses an interesting question: Are we edubloggers too harsh on our kids' teachers? and cites a number of recent posts that seem to indicate that progressive thinkers/writers about education may be disappointed in their own children's teachers. Audrey Watters at Hack Education reminisces about her son's difficult journey through school.
My kids, like most, had some superb teachers and some duds. While my daughter seemed to thrive on traditional education, my son did not seem well-served by many of his classes. As a parent (and as an administrator in the school district my son attended), I had to carefully choose if and when to intervene when he was struggling in school.
After a little reflection and considering Scott's question, I'd suggest:
- One of the toughest but most critical lessons children and young adults have to learn is how to develop real-world coping strategies. As a parent, I understand completely how much we want to keep our children from stress, from boredom, and from any sort of emotional or physical pain. But I also asked myself that if by intervening in my chlldren's problems if I were not depriving them of some necessary experiences in which they could develop the whole-life dispositions of patience, adjustment, subversion, recognition that the world is sometimes unjust, and discrimination of the important and unimportant. Children raised as "hot house flowers" by parents who step in at the first sign of problem may well fall apart when encountering the first college professor or supervisor who is challenging to work for. Self-reliance is a lovely attribute too often acquired through ugly experiences that are hard for a parent to watch.
As parent educators we need to carefully discriminate between a bad teacher and a teacher with a different educational methodology/philosophy. Not every teaching method works with every child, but I would argue that all pedagogies meet the needs of some children. A disagreement does not mean the teacher with whom one differs is incompetent. Keeping one's ego in check about always being confident of having the right answers to all things educational is tough.
- We need to know how to constructively intervene if problems that call for parental intervention do arise. When grandson Paul was not well-served by his school library program, his parents made sure he got to the public library. When my son struggled with a project, I would ask for the instructions and assessment tool so I could provide guidance and "quality control." Good parents use parent-teacher conferences, parent web portals to teacher gradebooks, and class websites to partner with the teacher in assuring their children's learning. And increasingly for many parents, choosing alternative educational experiences for the children might be the best thing to do - enrolling them in a magnet school, a constructivist-based school, an online school or home schooling or just making sure that their children are involved in extra-curricular activities and organizations (Scouts, 4-H, church, etc) that provide meaningful learning opportunities.
My heart goes out to all parents who feel their children are not getting the best educational experience possible, especially those visionary parents who dream of what schools could be. But let's all be careful how go about "improving" our children's schools - and our children's lives.