The Grandpa assignment
Monday, March 24, 2008 at 08:08PM Last weekend I received this from my grandson Paul who is in first grade:
Here is the response I would like to write, but the LWW doesn't think it is such a hot idea:
Dear Grandson Paul,
When I was your age, I was a pioneer child on the prairie in the wilds of northwest Iowa. All 13 of my brothers, all 12 of my sisters, my mom and dad, two second cousins and I lived in the little log cabin that is still in the city park. There are now only me, your great-aunt Becky and great-uncle Jeff left of all my brothers and sisters. Two were carried away in a flood, four were adopted by wolves, a tornado carried away three, a band of robbers captured four, giant rattlesnakes scared away five, one went missing in a blizzard, a great golden eagle swooped down and flew off with one, and we think one just got left someplace and nobody remembers where. We are looking for some of my brothers and sisters to this day. It was a hard life when I was a little boy growing up on the prairie. Most parents always had a few extra children - just to have some spares.
We were very, very poor when I was your age. Instead of toys, we only had sticks and dirt clods to play with. The rich kids in the neighborhood had rocks too, but we didn't. Grandma made all our clothes out of tree bark and animal skins - and not very fresh ones, either. We mostly ate mush, field corn and bullheads for supper. For Christmas, sometimes we got a raisin in our stocking. And were we excited! Breakfast and lunch usually were just the berries we could find in the woods. We had to fight over them with the bears. Our TV set only had 13 channels and color was not yet invented. In fact, the entire world was in black and white except for part of the movie The Wizard of Oz.
Most of the time we just worked. It was my job to gather eggs from the pigs. Pig eggs are very hard to find and sometimes the pigs got grumpy when they were nesting. You had to be careful or you might get bitten. My sister Lefty, had that happen to her. We tied a rope from the cabin to the barn door so we could follow it during dust storms. Once we had a dust storm that lasted so long we planted potatoes in the air around the cabin. When we harvested the spuds, they were already mashed. Yummmm!
I did get to go to school every other year from ages 5 to 27. Like most children, I had to walk to school, five miles each way and both directions were uphill. My teacher was very nice, but very busy with the 837 children in our one room school. Each of us had a laptop computer, however, and when the teacher was busy with other children, we surfed the Internet. I actually got to talk to Miss Snippet (my teacher) twice while I was in school. Both times she told me I was doing a good job. Our library only had seven books and it took a long time to get one to read at home. It was harder to learn to read when I was a little boy since the letters m and r had not yet been invented. They had just discovered the number 7 when I was in 3rd grade so I had to learn my number facts twice.
But I was happy growing up since I knew one day I would be a grandpa and have a wonderful grandson like you. And that's a fact.
Love,
The Grandpa who lives on the lake
Reader Comments (13)
I think you left the part out about walking to and from school uphill both ways. Classic.
The LWW is right. This is just too much historical reality for any young and impressionable child to cope with. Better stick to just the story about the bear that ate your lunch.
My Dad always talks about how they were so poor when he was a kid that the rats ran around their basement with tears in their eyes. And how his mother would announce they were going to get a change of underpants today. Don, you change with Frank, Frank you change with Brent ...
Brian
Please tell me those laptops had Pong. I am sure back then you also had to choose between AOL, CompuServe, and Prodigy to do your internet surfing.
Forget LWW's advice. I think we need to instill in our children a hefty dose of skepticism, what Ellen Langer might call mindfulness. It definitely would be a great teachable moment for that 1st grade class if the letters were read out loud.
Please, please, please send this in and tell us what happens!
Hi Charlie,
Walking uphill is in there! Read carefully.
All the best,
Doug
Hi Alice,
Mostly it was bullies who ate my lunch. I was not always the massive hunk you see today.
All the best,
Doug
Hi Brian,
Hmmmm, I'll have to remember these. Maybe Paul's little brother will get the same assignment. Thanks!
Doug
Hi Carl,
We'll we did have to read our keyboards only by candlelight.
I suspect that doubting what one's grandfather tells you is a 21st century skill!
Thanks for the note,
Doug
Hi Sylvia,
I think I may leave this up to Paul and my daughter. I'm sending in a more factual account as well. It was fun, though!
Doug
You uphill both ways walkers, you forgot the blizzard. But boy, I'd love to see the teacher's face if she read this.
Hi Janet,
I spent time in the airport this afternoon writing a "proper" letter too. I'll let Paul's mom decide if she wants the teacher to see my blog letter!
All the best,
Doug
The drawing is just great. I saw it yesterday, and it just made my day. I can tell you had fun with your assignment.:)
Hi Betty,
I can't take credit for the drawing (or coloring), but yes, the job WAS fun.
All the best,
Doug
Paul's teacher has a wonderful sense of humor. (You need one to teach first grade, I think!!) I sent her this letter so she can teach the kiddos about tall tales. Who needs Paul Bunyan and his Blue Ox when you have Grandpa at the lake??
I am LOL, Carrie (Paul's mom). Doug, I think you have another talent waiting to emerge. A tall tale anthology? You could get Blue Skunk artist to illustrate!
Sharon,
Tall tales? But every word was true!
Doug