"Dear Dr. Laura" is making the rounds again
Tuesday, June 12, 2012 at 06:11AM The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose. - Shakespeare
(Warning to religious conservatives and homophobes, read no further. It will only put you off your bran flakes.)
With a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage on the Minnesota ballot this fall, the wickedly funny (and to the point) letter below is circulating again. It's good to see. The letter has an interesting history (as does Dr. Schlessinger herself) on Snopes.
I always get in trouble with some readers for posting on "off topic" social issues (like here). While I've never had much interest in marrying another guy and my own children are all straight or digisexuals, I have very good friends to whom this is a very important issue in their families. And if you don't support your friends, what damn good are you?
Fire away...
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law.
I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. ... End of debate.
I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Law and how to follow them.
- When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
- I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
- I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.
- Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
- I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2. The passage clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
- A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?
- Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
- Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die?
- I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
- My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help.
Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your adoring fan,
Anonymous
Reader Comments (8)
I love the West Wing homage to this (actually, I pretty much loved The West Wing). As a Vermonter, I'm proud to learn the letter started making the rounds after Vermont made Civil Unions legal. I'm even prouder that same-sex marriage is now legal here as well. While, like you, I don't have a dog in this particular hunt, I think equal rights and respect are always worth fighting for. And this letter pokes fun at the dogma so very deliciously...
Amen, brother. If we don't speak up for our friends and families who will speak up for us. Balderdash, I say!
I must have my email filters set too high. This is the first I've seen of this "letter" and thanks for posting it. Love it!
As for being "off topic", no worries. In the world of information, nothing is pure anymore (if it ever was) and every topic is connected in some way. Go for it!
Hi Tim,
Until reading the Snopes article, I didn't know the letter dated from 2000!
Doug
A few thoughts from a religious conservative on this post / letter :
1. I note the use of Old Testament references in this letter, perhaps implying that a conservative view of homosexuality is an Old Testament only idea. It is not, with the same principles found in the New Testament -- Romans 1 for just one example.
2. In reading the Bible, one should consider, among other things, context. This includes historical, cultural, geographical and such contexts of the time as well as the context of the passage in its book and in the Bible as a whole.
3. In reading the Old Testament, one should also consider the convenent context and the symbolic, teaching nature of some of the laws.
4. While I hope this is not true of you, Doug, I do find some communication outlets tending to make fun of what they view as conservative foibiles but not considering what might be considered as liberal foilbles. Does respect go both ways on the equal rights highway? I would hope so as dogma (comment from Shannon) goes both ways certainly.
5. As a matter of research (checking sources, looking at multiple sides of a matter, etc) I looked up what Dr, Laura herself might have to say on this letter or matter. Here is one post from her blog:
http://www.drlaurablog.com/2010/06/22/setting-my-record-straight-about-gays/
Thank you
Hi Betsy,
I am glad this post generated at least one negative reaction.
What genuinely confuses me is that conservatives seem to want to interpret the Bible literally when it suits their beliefs, but then advise readers to "consider the historical context" when the directives seem absurd. How is one supposed to know the difference or draw the line. It seems to me homosexuality could be considered as archaic a prohibition as is cutting one's hair or touching pigs.
And you are more than welcome to tease me about my "liberal" values anytime. I think the extremes on both religious and political ends are ripe for sharp humor, to be honest.
Thanks for the link to Laura's reply. I did not know such a thing existed.
Doug
These, I believe, are legitimate questions and deserve a thoughtful answer. I will post a response at my blog http://computa-cat55.blogspot.com/ within a day or two.
Thanks, Betsy. I look forward to reading your post.
Doug